You have probably saw him on some photos on this blog. You maybe even met him in-world. Sure, you could spot him staring shyly from the dark of the header image up there. Yup, the guy on my left, the black one with glasses.
So please, let me introduce you Mr. Dee.
At first I just needed a male avatar for a photo and none of the friends I could ask for that delicate favour was online. If my memory doesn't lie to me (as it usually does) it was the picture for the post about dictionary's role in cybersex. That funny gray-haired guy in the back. Then he was needed for a story about a guy tricked by transgendered griefer. Yes, inside than shape is me feeling weird and funny.
So, I thought, if there is going to be a male dandellion, let's make him looking good. Shape was not the problem. Skin was, because I was short on money and really wasn't looking for regular-SL-guy-from-the-clubs look. But I had some luck. You know that feeling when you see the skin that is just what would you had in mind if there was any idea in the mind? And for the price of L$500 when upper left corner says L$510. After that, when I got a bit more pennies on my account, I learned how really is to be man in second life, shopping-wise. No wander that boys rarely change their clothes. But Mr. Dee got some nice clothes after all. And a name.
Mr. Dee was nice and ready to jump into the world, to start living outside of my photo studio. Or so he thought. Problems were yet to be met. Which is something I'll leave him to tell you in a day or two. Stay tuned…
Very nice story, Dan! :-) Maybe you could be “brother and sister”? Ms. Dandellion and Mr. Dan? :-D
Gotta love him!!!
Welcom Mr. Dee… Who knows maybe one day he’ll meet up with a Mr. K, too?
Lol, now I understand your comment on Dylan’s blog better :)
I totally agree about the men’s shopping indeed. And I’m curious for the sequel on this post ;-)
Oh yes, shopping for men is quite a task – even when you are willing to pay the premium real good male clothing costs. However I can’t stop to repeat it again and again: surprisingly many female items can be used unisex. Just be a bit more daring!
I am looking forward to more adventures of Mr. D!
… and thank you all for a warm welcome :)
One last consideration that I’d like to make about this.
After more than a year in SL and thousands of rants all over the blogosphere about the condemnation of every form of shape/genderbending, I have to say that it came as a bit of a surprise for me how Dee’s introduction has been welcomed. Not that I am not glad about this of course. Now I feel a little more confident about the ppl “resisting” inside the metaverse. It’s so glad to know that I am still surrounded by such nice, kind and very open-minded people. This is the best that virtual socialization has to offer. And I’m so glad to be amongst you. Cheers!
My standpoint on this always was and always will be that everybody is free to do whatever he/she/it pleases, as long as they don’t hurt or play with people intentionally and STICK to the role they picked up for themselves. SL is THE place to experiment, and live dreams and phantasies of all kind.
I agree 100%with you, Peter.
Thanks for the support. I am happy to live among open-minded people as well.
Actually, as this adventure is going on I am thinking about all the benefits of transgendering in virtual space. Will share those too.
If I am understanding what I am reading, you simply created a new look for your existing avatar? One that is male? So the tag over your head still shows your original name?
Do you think you would feel differently about Mr. Dee if he was a separate alt account? Would he then feel more detached from the inworld self you are used to being? I think you would find that he would develop differently. I have had this experience creating a male alt account. (I had to – a man walking around with the name "Princess" over his head is going to run into all kinds of difficult and awkward experiences on the grid!)
Just be careful please with the gender bending. People have very strong, and varying feelings about it. People fall in love in SL, just like in RL, with what they see before them, and can feel deceived or mislead when they realize you are something quite different in RL. For other people, it doesn’t bother them at all. But you never know until you are in the midst of it, so please tread carefully, and be mindful of other people’s assumptions. Honesty is always the best policy, I think.
You are writing some really great stuff in this blog, and I am glad to have discovered it!
Princess Ivory
Indeed, it is just a new folder (though very big one already) inside the old account. Time will show if that was a good idea. There were pro’s and con’s… but, I think, I was going for "no matter how different personalities there are, we all live in the same head so we can squeeze in the same account". I am really not sure if I was right.
I am aware of all the nasty things that can happen with gender bending. There is no definite protection, but I guess that some care and good intentions will keep us all nice and smiled.
I’ll answer the rest of the questions after the next post .
Eidur, I think Dande is getting a lot of support because she’s posting here , amongst friends. I would expect her to get savaged as sad and deceptive if her story was posted on one of the larger SL news sites.
I agree with Peter. People are pretty much free to be what they wish, here. I think there’s an obligation for them to identify themselves as Digital or Atomic, and to stick to it , but that’s about it.
Last time I checked Dande’s FL profile it said she was an octopus. While not entirely honest, I think it pretty much says "don’t assume anything about my FL". :P
Princess Ivory’s suggestion about an alt is not a bad one, by the way.
There were pro’s and con’s… but, I think, I was going for "no matter how different personalities there are, we all live in the same head so we can squeeze in the same account". I am really not sure if I was right.
Whoops, we crossposted. That’s a good argument for keeping both of you on the same account. Now I’m not sure which is best :P Having an alt probably adds complications of it’s own, and a whole different set of moral dilemmas. One thing at a time, maybe?
Regardless, good luck!
My 1st life tab is not octopus anymore. I’ve mutated into a dolphin :p
Anyway, I think I should change my profile picture. The current one shows technowitch – dK in one of her female forms. Which does confuse people when Mr. Dee is walking around. Should make a pic with both of us smiling there :)
Have you met fellow Extropian Citizen Dale Innis? He (she? they?) has one persona, but shifts between sexes. They’ve got a split screen picture in their SL profile section.